i didn't sell out, i bought in.

I feel that I am an inadequate blogger. Either not enough time in the day, or really lack of desire to make time for my thoughts. There are so many things to say and share, and like so many other things in my life i just feel as though i am unqualified. but here is an attempt at my thoughts as of late.

life's twists and turns and ups and downs have taken me on a rather incredible journey. the past few years have been something that i never thought was possible for myself. to be incredibly cliche it's the stuff of dreams. my dream has taken me into a land of self sufficiency and excellence in academics. this is what my life has come to. this is what i love. i find myself no longer being an idealist or a rebel. i find myself not integrating with society, and not trying so hard to rage against it. i feel i don't quite fit anywhere. i'm not a punk, or a hipster, or really any other category of subculture that i clung to so closely in my formative years. i'm still trying to find my place in the grand social landscape that is this world. to be honest i'm not sure i really care anymore. the shows and the drinking, and the competition and the overall "grandeur" of the subculture is so exhausting and unappealing to me at this time in my life.

what is appealing is the knowledge that i am gaining this semester in my gross anatomy class. i wish i could share this experience with the people that i know. it is something so incredible, i'm not sure i could even describe it properly if i tried. our bodies are amazing and to see the actual parts that make us function, it's something i never thought i would see. i am completely comfortable giving up the popularity and "credibility" of subculture life style to dedicate my life to the study of structure and function of the human body, and how to rehabilitate our bodies when life's twists and turns lead us to injury.

fin.